|Alias(es)||King Kuda, KingTukr, Stevie from Malcolm in the Middle, TJ (don't ask)|
|Weight / Height||Skinny Nigga / But my Dick Long|
|Birthday / Age||9.18 / I lost track at 1738|
|Main Ability||Sexy God|
|Birthplace||A place millions of chromosomes away.|
|Affiliation(s)||CRP Wikia, Le Bulturius Podcast, Kansere Klub|
|Base of Operations||N'AWLENS|
"Zero Score and nein years ago, I had a picture taken. Somehow I found that shit, and now I shall present it to the world."
― Kuda to the Chat
Yung Kuda is a legendary bastard who abuses multiple life choices, such as swearing, chat mod powers, and a cancerous youtube channel. He's a sexy beast who refuses to show a picture of him in the present, as it would lead to a chat meltdown via Vulture's steaming hot jizz. Also, I am this guy. Why am I telling you this? Who fucking cares!?
Yung Kuda has an immensely high Tinder status, getting the most "right swipes." This is due to his immensely good looks. His sexy face may be deceiving, though; he is only five years old, yet has lived for many, MANY millennia. How does that work, you might ask? It just does.
He is typically seen in flatbill hats eighteen sizes too large, which greatly compliments the aviator sunglasses he stole from the bitch he fucked in 2006. He has AA cup boobs but doesn't wear a bra, because #ManWhoreLife. Yung Kuda likes to walk down the streets shirtless to show the ladies his rippling abs and manly biceps. His sleek, negro (white) skin contrasts his black pants, the only pair that fits due to his enormous bulge. Finally, he wears Kanye's first pair of Yeezys, which are fake. All Yeezys are fake.
Fucking Bitches, When she doesn't ask if he has protection
When she asks if he has protection, Forgetting his protection
Fucking bitches, Bucking fitches
- Author Avatar
On a planet that is millions of chromosomes from earth, in the year 2 B.K.K. (before kazoo kid), Kevin Hart and Harley Quinn had a child. The baby was incredibly manly, with a beard the size of his dick, which, in prepubescence, was the model for the Washington Monument's construction. (Fun Fact: The Washington Monument was created at a scale factor of .000000Nein in comparison to Yung Kuda's bulging cock.) Harley Quinn was astounded, and Kevin Hart shrunk to 2'3" in order to forever be at eye level with the child, not bothering to grow as Yung Kuda outgrew the man.
Oddly, those weren't his birth parents. They just found him laying there. So the two legends took the child into their care, and that was his birthday. As Yung Kuda realized that Harley was basically just his babysitter, he began to fuck her, giving the sexy bitch the greatest time of her life. To this day, the legendary Yung Kuda still fucks her in multiple positions and has a sex tape on hold.
What, I'm supposed to put more? Literally, I'm not supposed to write smut on this wiki, so yeah. Kill yourself.
ZEE KANSERE UHRIVZ
[To Be Written]
- Sexy God - Due to Yung Kuda's unrivaled sexiness, he is considered to be the most beautiful creature on the torso of the Earth. Aliens watch him become Miss World every year and jack off to that shit.
- ALL THE HOES - BOATS AND HOES, BOATS AND HOES, YOU GOT A BIG DICK SO YOU GOT BOATS AND HOES.
- BAYSD GAWD - lolnuffsaid
- 10/10 IGN Kuda > FaZe - Being the ultimate trickshotter on Call of Booty: Wodern Moanfare 2, his abilities with a ballista are unmatched by even the brave souls that paste the navy seals copypasta.
- Halsey's Seen my Young God ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) - Five years old and still reks Nic juan v juan
- Mountain Dew
8/8 would r8 gr8 m8 trickshots better than FaZe Temperrr m8 kill urslev m8 w bleach lol got em. What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.
- Every Trickshot - faze wishes they could be him
- Bitch Fucker - rolls up to the crib and fucks your bitch like he did 9 months before you were born lol got em m8y
- Pussy Destroyer - GOTTA SMASH
- none lol
- Yung Kuda was originally gonna do a face reveal at 5 million subs but hit 69 million on the first day of his channel. He renamed the channel to "Pewdiepie" and gave it to some weird Swedish guy. He regrets that decision every day.
- Yung Kuda has been diagnosed with diabeetus, a disease that gives him the ability to roast Tumblr people on a daily basis.